The Gift of Doing

Today is my third day of 29 Gifts giving.  I knew last night what I wanted to give today. But first a little background.

 

My husband takes great care of me, our children, our house, our yard, all the things both big and small that make our family comfortable. When we married over 18 years ago, we made an agreement that while I would take care of the family paperwork, bill-paying, etc., he would clean the bathrooms.  That seemed like a fair exchange as I don't mind the paperwork and do mind bathroom cleaning, and he minds bill-paying, but doesn't mind cleaning the bathroom.  Over the course of time, the bathroom cleaning became all sweeping, mopping, and vacuuming.  In addition, he takes care of the yard, the car maintenance, and the garbage.  And he doesn't complain.  He doesn't procrastinate.  He just gets in there and takes care of what needs to be done.  I asked him about that recently and he said that he just does it because it needs to be done. He doesn't enjoy it, but he knows when he has something that has to be done, it's best to just get in there and do it.

 

Today is garbage day.  Which means when he comes home from work, he'll have to drag the recycle bins and garbage can from the street back to the house.  He leaves for work so early in the morning that the sun hasn't even come up.  When I was thinking about today's gift, I thought that I would surprise him by bringing the bins back to the garage.  So when I heard the recycle truck go by, I did just that!  I haven't told him, and I won't ask him about it when I get home from work myself. I wonder if he'll even mention that the bins were already collected. 

 

The best part is that even if he doesn't, I know it made his afternoon a little easier.  And that giving doesn't have to be tangible things. That sometimes the best gift can be having something done for you, especially if it's something you do because you have to.

 

 

29 Gifts - The Beginning

A few months ago, I read an article about the book 29 Gifts: How a Month of Giving Can Change Your Life, by Cami Walker ( http://www.29gifts.org/ ).  Our local library's summary reads:

 

"This is the powerful story of the author's struggle with multiple sclerosis and how a healer's unusual prescription of mindful altruism--to "give away 29 gifts in 29 days"--ignited her energy, her happiness, and invited more abundance into her life."

 

I was intrigued by the concept of making a conscious effort to give for 29 days in a row.  To make a concerted effort to give something, anything, to someone else.  I read the book and felt compelled to participate.  One of the premises is that if you skip a day, you should start over.  And that you should chronicle what you give.  My initial read of the book was in late December - a perfect time for giving, or so I thought. But five days in and I missed a day. And then another day. Followed by another.

 

But my thoughts about doing this didn't leave me. And I again feel compelled to try again. My birthday was on Sunday. I treat my birthday much the same as many people treat New Year's Day - as a beginning, a time to restart.

 

So I'm giving this a go again.  (Sorry for the pun.)  I began yesterday, May 3rd. I may not post every day about what I find to give, but I am committed to making a record of it even if I collapse several days into a single entry.

 

May 3rd.  A co-worker has been out for a few weeks awaiting back surgery (which she had today). Between the days out ahead of surgery and the days she'll miss for recovery, her paid-leave has been exhausted. Our workplace allows us to donate sick-leave to other employees in circumstances such as hers. My gift for Monday, May 3rd, was the gift of a day.

 

May 4th.  Regarding my aforementioned birthday, I received some unexpected gifts from friends. I have been truly celebrated and profusely expressed my thanks in person. My gift today are the hand-written thank you notes which more than just say thank you for the gifts, but specifically tell them what they mean to me and my family.  I think it's important to not only tell people that, but to hear it about yourself.  So maybe my gift is a "warm fuzzy feeling" to them. I hope so.

 

If you get a chance to read the book or visit the website, please do. And if you're moved to participate in the 29 Gifts, let me know; I'd love to read about your journey.

Do you really have to block the aisle while talking on your cell phone?

Cell phones have been a part of our society for a number of years now, and it's quite common to see people doing all sorts of mundane activities while carrying on a conversation. I am generally not bothered by people using their cell phones in public places, but yesterday I had one too many encounters with a cell-phone user.

I was doing our weekly shopping at our local super-store. They have recently made changes to ensure that the aisles are wide enough for two carts to pass and not have displays set up that you have to manuever around. I had less than 20 items on my list and I knew which aisles I needed to go on... a total of six aisles. And wouldn't you know it? On all six aisles, there was at least one individual standing in the middle, blocking the way, talking on her cell phone (yes, they happened to all be women). Is it really necessary to be using your phone while selecting the type of soup you want? Or the flavor of juice? What about which frozen pizza? I can see if you've called to confirm that your spouse wants the supreme and not the four-cheese, but come on... even if you're checking your list, you don't have to stand in the middle of the aisle, not moving, blocking the way for everyone else.

Move along people!

A quote from Queen Latifah

"As long as God puts breath in your body, you have the opportunity to
do something great, something special, and something new every day." ~
Queen Latifah

I heard her say this on today's episode of The Martha Stewart Show,
and it struck a chord with me. How many opportunities do we miss
because we're not looking for them? Or because we don't recognize
them for what they are?

Something great, something special doesn't have to be something that
everyone else sees... You get to decide what it is!

So take a deep breath and go find your something great!

A Corner at a Time

I like the idea of spring cleaning. It's the implementation that I have trouble with, yet every now and then, I have time, energy, and supplies on hand to do a mini-spring-clean. This morning was one of those times, and the target of my attention was the corner of the room where our desk is.

A couple of years ago, we had cleaned out and organized everything inside the desk, and that's been well-maintained, so it was only the top of the desk and behind and underneath that needed attention. Dust had accumulated pretty thickly on the wood in the knee-hole, and the baseboards both behind and to the side of the desk were breeding dust-bunnies as well.

The desk sits at a window which often affords the entertainment of squirrels and birds at play between our house and the neighbor's. We have a beautiful azalea bush full of blossoms this spring. But the window is also near a bathroom, and the moisture from there creates an ick-factor on the window edges. Ay yi yi. I should look at that more often. The blinds were full of dust as was the window ledge that we use as a shelf for the desk.

I found my Nintendo DS and believe it or not, both of my games were still in their cases beneath it. They hadn't been swiped by the children! I am charging it up now so I can see how things are going in my Animal Crossing town. I'm certain there is a lot of spring cleaning to do there, as well.

So I cleared the desk off, filed papers in either their appropriate folder, the recycle bag, or the shredder, dusted everything and placed things back neatly and in order. I scrubbed the baseboards and the windowsill. I dusted the walls all the way up to the ceiling. It's amazing how even walls collect dust!

And now I'm posting this to my blog. I have plenty of room on the desktop, I can see the beautiful azaleas out the window, and just enjoying this corner that's spring-clean!

The Sights, Sounds, and Smells of Spring

I believe Spring has finally arrived in our part of the U.S. Azaleas are in full bloom, vehicles are covered in a fine film of pollen, and the sky is that beautiful shade of blue you only see after the dreary days of winter.

Mornings are filled with the sounds of birds calling, interrupted occasionally by the whoosh of hot air balloons floating over the house. Afternoons are filled with the roar of the lawn mowers and the nursery songs blaring from the ice cream truck.

Evenings are filled with the aroma of dinner - some wafting through open windows and others drifting over from the backyard grills. The smells of chicken and steak, hamburgers and hot dogs.

Ah, Spring!

The Hammock

All week I have been eyeing the hammock in the back yard of the villa we've been at. It's in the middle of a lightly wooded area near the edge of the marsh with enough of a clearing that you can feel secluded but not isolated. I've not seen anyone using it this week which really surprised me. Our guide said there are 18 hammocks available, yet this one - and the one a little bit away - have not seen use - at least not when I've been watching from our balcony.

So today I wandered over to try it out. I've not done much hammocking in my life, if there is even such a word. But I've seen lots of episodes of Gilligan's Island and America's Funniest (Home) Videos to know that there is a trick to getting on and off a hammock and that for an inexperienced hammock-user, it's probably best to not have an audience.

Fortunately this hammock is secured with heavy chains and ropes and attached to wooden posts, so structurally the thing wasn't going anywhere. It was also positioned low enough to the ground for a shorter person such as myself to be able to just lower herself into it as if sitting on a chair. Easy as pie and no mishap!

There is something so calming and soothing about swinging in a hammock, looking straight up into the sky (just make sure to check the position of the sun before deciding which end to put your head or you might have to readjust). The pine trees surrounding my hammock were so very tall and full of pinecones. Thankfully the wind wasn't blowing, so I wasn't concerned about a stray pinecone falling on me. I could watch the birds flying over, darting here and there. I could listen to the squirrels scampering across the clearing.

Each of my children came and joined me on the hammock. It was nice to lay beside each other, with my head at one end and theirs at the other, to talk about whatever came to mind. To just be quiet together. To enjoy each other's company without distraction.

And later today, as the sun was beginning its late afternoon descent, the hammock was vacant. I took a magazine, intending to read in the quiet, cool place. But somehow the gentle swaying of the hammock rocked me to sleep.

Magazines

Every now and then I take the pile of unread magazines I have and sort them out to see what I haven't read. I subscribe to a lot of magazines but most are the results of reward programs such as MyCokeRewards or e-rewards so we aren't paying for them directly.

I knew it was time to see what I have when the stack got about 18-inches high. I put each magazine in its own pile; some have only one issue, some have three or more, some have each month's issue while others are missing a month somewhere between the January and April issues.

I get a variety of magazines. Martha Stewart Living, Body & Soul (which I recently heard will have a new name), Everyday Food. Conde Nast Traveler and Travel & Leisure. Teen Vogue. Health. Reader's Digest. Runners World. Money. Forbes. Family Fun. Interestingly, I don't have any unread issues of Entertainment Weekly! I read those within two days of receiving them.

So now I have to decide to I want to start with the most recent issues of each magazine and just recycle the rest (or leave somewhere that has even older magazine for customers / patients) or do I want to skim through and rip out the things I might want to look at later.

Guess I'd better get to reading.

Ode to Extra Fruit Sensations

Oh Extra Fruit Sensations, how you enhance my day!

Your Berry Pearadise gum makes my tastebuds tingle.

How invigorating is your flavor.

Your purpleness makes me smile.

 

Not so crazy about the Sweet Watermelon.

NCAA Tournament Basketball Picks

My favorite part about the NCAA Basketball Tournament is filling out the form. You know, where you start with 65 teams and bring it down to one.

I'm picking Kansas and Kentucky in the finals, with Kentucky winning.

Final four: Kansas vs. Syracuse, Kentucky vs. Duke.

At eight, I have Kansas vs. Ohio State, Syracuse vs, Pittsburgh, Kentucky vs. West Virginia, and Duke vs. Villanova.

Sweet Sixteen: Kansas vs. Maryland, Tennessee vs. Ohio State, Syracuse vs. Vanderbilt, Pittsburgh vs. Kansas State, Kentucky vs. Wisconsin, New Mexico vs. West Virginia, Duke vs. Purdue, and Baylor vs. Villanova.

From the beginning (my winning picks are in bold):
Kansas vs. Lehigh
UNLV vs Northern Iowa
Michigan State vs. New Mexico State
Maryland vs. Houston
Tennessee vs. San Diego State
Georgestown vs Ohio
Oklahomas St. vs Georgia Tech
Ohio State vs. UC Santa Barbara
Syracuse vs Vermont
Gonzaga vs Florida State
Butler vs UTEP
Vanderbilt vs. Murray St.
Xavier vs. Minnesota
Pittsburgh vs. Oakland
BYU vs Florida
Kansas St. vs. North Texas

Ark-PB vs. Winthrop

Kentucky vs. E. Tenn. State
Texas vs. Wake Forest
Temple vs. Cornell
Wisconsin vs. Wofford
Marquette vs. Washington
New Mexico vs. Montana
Clemson vs. Missouri
West Virginia vs. Morgan St.
Duke vs. Winthrop
California vs. Louisville
Texas A&M vs. Utah State
Purdue vs. Siena
Notre Dame vs. Old Dominion
Baylor vs. Sam Houston St.
Richmond vs. Saint Mary's
Villanova vs. Robert Morris

Now let's see how I do. Starting March 18th and going through April 5th.

Feel free to comment and tell me who you pick!

A letter about the letter - or You'll get your Census next week

Last week, I received an official envelope in the mail with 2010 Census printed in bold letters. The 2010 Census was here! I set it aside so I could complete it along with my usual weekly paperwork.

I showed the envelope to my son and we talked about how important it is to participate in the census. He will be doing several activities at school revolving around the census, so I wanted him to know that our family will be doing our part.

I carefully opened the envelope, slipped out the paper, and began to read. To my dismay, I found that it wasn't the census after all; it was a letter telling me to watch the mail for the Census that would be arriving some time in the next week.

Groan! I know that it's important to get the word out that the census is coming and I get that it's important to get as much participation as possible, but did they really have to send me a letter to tell me to look for another letter / envelope?

It's like at work sometimes when we have a meeting coming up. We'll have a pre-meeting, or as my middle schooler likes to say, "a meeting about the meeting."

In this case, we got a letter about the letter.

Wonder how much that cost?

The Magical World of the DVR

We have just entered the magical world of the DVR. After months of debating the utility of adding DVR to our cablevision, we now have the ability to record television programs at literally the push of a button. No more looking for a blank videotape; no more making sure the time on the VCR is set correctly; no more having to find yet another remote control.

 

No more checking the time to not miss our favorite shows because we didn't want to have the hassle of setting the VCR. No more hurrying through household tasks or rushing around during the commercials to get things done. No more wondering what the characters just said because someone talked over the dialogue. 

 

But now we have so many shows to record! So many movies or programs we didn't even know we wanted to watch because they weren't convenient. Now we wonder how we'll ever watch everything we're recording. Because the hours available to watch television didn't increase just because we have the ability to watch at our convenience.

 

I think we're going to find that we watch the same amount of television and that we watch the same programs we were watching before. Only now we'll have a bit more freedom as to when we watch them, and how long it takes to watch since we can fast-forward through the commercials.

Dear Monday

Dear Monday,

Thank you for coming around only once a week. Your early morning wake-
up call always startles me back to the reality of work and routine. I
don't mind the work, and I thrive on routine, but there is always a
bit of shock to your morning arrival.

Please coordinate with Sunday night so it can be a little longer and
you can arrive a couple of hours later.

Love,
Not a Monday morning person

Crossing Magnolia

I've lived in the same city since 1982, yet it's not the same as it was 28 years ago when I moved here. And I don't live in the same area of town as I did when I was a fresh-faced, carless university freshman. Back then, I walked everywhere I wanted to go, or took the bus, or rode my bike, or occasionally got a ride with someone. I lived in the same house for four years of undergrad and during that time, my "world" was limited to where I could go under my own power.

I got a car at the end of undergrad as I was interning far enough from my home and not on a convenient bus route. My world expanded and I could drive all over town. And I did. But even then, "all over town" took about 15 minutes to go from one side to the other, and even then, most of the places I needed or wanted to go were within a small radius.

Another few years later and my job location moved across town and with it, so did my choice of apartment locations. I soon lived a mile from the office and nearly everything I needed was within a mile's radius. I was dating the man I would soon marry and he lived "way out" - about four miles from where we worked.

When we married, it seemed we lived "way out" at first, but then more and more businesses built and located to our side of town. Grocery stores, movie theater, Sam's Club. When WalMart and Costco built on the corner of the main intersection right on our regular route, we were all set.

We realized a few years ago that we never seem to have a reason to go further than about five miles from our house. And that five-mile mark is known as Magnolia Boulevard. We very rarely have to cross Magnolia, and we're comfortable staying on our side of town, in our sector of our city. We have everything we need. Library, post office, car service centers. We do so much business online or by phone that we don't have to drive across Magnolia. It has become a dividing line, or even a barrier to our lives.

Recently, though, we had reason to cross Magnolia. Firstly, I had jury duty at the courthouse. Which was downtown. Across Magnolia. I wasn't sure I'd find the portal to the other side going or coming home. The following day, we took our children to renew their passports. Funny thing about children's passports - they require the children to be presented in person. And then at the end of the week, we had to go by the cable company to get a digital converter box and yep, the local cable company is located across Magnolia.

During our journey across Magnolia, we found ourselves driving by our old haunts from college. I was amazed at how much had changed since the last time I had been by the university. When we were walking downtown to take the children for their passports, we remarked how it felt like when we tour other cities on vacation. We saw some local sites that we want to visit on another day.

Maybe it's ok to cross Magnolia!

The Queen of Hearts

Several months ago, I had a brief encounter with the Walt Disney version of the Queen of Hearts. I was on the fourth deck of the Disney Magic, looking down into the Atrium watching the holiday festivities, when Alice came by clearing the way for the Queen to pass. I turned to look and came eye-to-eye with the Queen, and as she passed, she swished her robes at me. At that moment, I knew I had met my inner-villian!

So of course I had to see the newly released Alice in Wonderland movie which documented Alice's return to Wonderland. Only in this story, the Queen of Hearts was known as the Red Queen, and she had a tiny body and an outrageously big head. But her spirit was the same; irrationally dealing with everything that didn't suit her with a loud "off with his head!"

I embrace the Queen and my likeness to her, for at times, I find my response to things to be equally absurd. While I don't shout "off with their heads" when things don't go the way I expect them to, I do find myself checking my reactions for QOHness.

Whenever I channel the QOH, my family calls me on it. They are thinking of getting a QOH playing card for me to wear around my neck as a warning sign to all who cross my path. I say that recognizing the absurdity within ourselves leads to self-improvement and self-control.

What I love about Friday

1. It's the last day of work this week.
2. WhatAFriday club meeting
3. Date night at Costco
4. New episodes of Disney Channel shows
5. Knowing I don't have to get up at a certain time tomorrow.

What I love about Thursday

1. It is one day closer to the weekend.
2. The Publix ad comes out.
3. Survivor!
4. The Office
5. Every other week is a payday!

What I love about Wednesday

1. Listening to piano lessons
2. Bible class
3. Burritos for dinner
4. Leaving work by 5 o'clock
5. Reading the recap of The Biggest Loser on www.ew.com

What I love about Tuesday

1. Watching The Biggest Loser
2. "Kids Eat Free" at many restaurants
3. The branch library is open after being closed on Monday
4. Weigh in day
5. Pizza night means no one has to cook

What I love about Monday

1. Going to work because it means I have a job.
2. Reading the recap of The Amazing Race over at www.ew.com
3. 10-percent off at my favorite local Mexican restaurant
4. No crowds at Sam's Club
5. Turning the page in my calendar, although really, it would be nice to find a week-at-a-time calendar that put Sunday at the top of the page.